A Big Day For A Small Wiener!

BeforeAfterI was playing around on Facebook this morning and saw that my friend Sharon (I always say her name like Ozzy yells to his wife Sharon) had liked, posted or shared a page about someone named Obie and his weight loss. Of course I had to click on the page and quickly realized that Obie is a 5 year old standard Dachshund whose aging owners with failing health simply loved him with food.  A volunteer picked him up in Washington State and drove him to his new owner/angel Nora, in Oregon.

Nora had no idea what to expect when Obie arrived Saturday, August 18th, and to her astonishment he was an extremely sweet and loving Dachshund who weighed 77 pounds.

Obie has been on a special diet to lose the weight and get back to being a happy dog. After many hours of swim therapy, treadmill and hikes outside he has lost 40 pounds in the past 8 months. (Human or Animal, that is inspiring!)

Today is a big day for Obie as he finally gets to have the excess skin removed since losing the 40lbs. He weighs in at 37lbs and 4oz today with an ideal weight of around 28 to 30 pounds. Dr. Kramer will be performing the surgery at Oregon Expert Vets. He will stay in the hospital tonight so he can receive IV fluids and pain medication.

Way to go Obie! We will be watching for updates and sending lot’s of love and positive thoughts to this “little” guy.

For more information about Obie and to follow his inspiring story, please visit the Obie Dog Website at http://www.obiedog.com  or on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/BiggestLoserDoxieEdition?hc_location=timeline

My Sweater Looked Like A Bowel Movement With Arms

Here’s an important piece of advice: The first time you meet an adorable actress who is playing you in a movie, try to dress appropriately.

The first time I met Hilary Duff was just before her concert at the Dodge Theater in Phoenix, Arizona. It was a typical sweltering night in Phoenix and there were  “tweens” screaming and jumping around everywhere. We were escorted back to the VIP area and were given a sticker along with some kind of wrist band.

My Mom and I were sitting next to each other watching in silence as people would come and go. I will admit that I was excited to be there. Hell, I was excited to be anywhere. I had just been released from one of my many hospital stays, with my wound-vac suctioning away as my only reminder.

About ten minutes later the security guard came in and asked us to follow him. To say that I sweat when I’m nervous is a total understatement. I had a line of sweat from my forehead to my armpits and my feet were sliding around in my shoes.

We walked in the door and Hilary was standing with her Mom and her manager. I could see her smile quickly turn to a look of horror across her face. She glanced up and down and slowly shook her head from side to side. Now if you know me or if you have read parts of this blog you will know that while I may try to dress well, it’s ALWAYS been a challenge for me.

Still in shock, she scanned my hair that was now pulled back and partially wet from the sweat that had pooled along my forehead. I had on a large brown, yellow and green Mohair-Wool sweater that could have easily doubled as a bowel movement with arms. The 40% polyester and 60% Acrylic was little or no help in aiding the uncontrollable sweating. I had on black leggings and black moon boots, that I still to this day have no idea where they came from or why I chose to wear them. I was dressed for a blizzard on a 98 degree evening.

Under my ball of wool, my arm hair had been moistened just enough to enhance my huge paws that I had continuously wiped on my pants to keep dry. I was literally a hot mess. Hilary was sweet and treated me very well. I quickly explained that I admired her fashion style and that I was a total nightmare when it comes to clothes, hair and makeup. We talked about the movie and how I was a total jackass as a teenager. She was then asked by some guy to go to the stage where hundreds of screaming kids waited for her.

There were a few pictures taken (what I would give to have one of those pictures for proof of how hideous I looked) and then we were on our way.

Here is a picture of how I looked…if you find a real picture of me at that concert, please send it and I will post here.


Some Things Aren’t Always What They Seem To Be… Get The Facts Before You Judge.

Often times people will say something that isn’t always accurate or true, yet they judge the person before getting all of the facts. I learned very quickly that while something may sound hilarious in my head, chances are pretty good that it won’t translate well at all. (Unless you have a sick twisted sense of humor.)
So take some time and get the facts before coming to a conclusion about someone or something.
The photos below are shared by Tanner Ringerud BuzzFeed Staff
 (This is not a dog politely riding the train to work.)

1. (This is not a dog politely riding the train to work.)

(This is not a tiny man riding on a woman's back.)

2. (This is not a tiny man riding on a woman’s back.)

(This is not a woman grabbing at her own crotch.)

3. (This is not a woman grabbing at her own crotch.)

(This is not a bottomless transgendered woman hanging out with friends.)

4. (This is not a bottomless transgendered woman hanging out with friends.)

(This is not a woman with a foot for a hand.)

5. (This is not a woman with a foot for a hand.)

(This man does not have an erection, and his penis (probably) doesn't look like a small arm.)

6. (Uhem… I’m sure it doesn’t look like a small arm.)

(This girl doesn't have insanely hairy arms.)

7. (This girl doesn’t have insanely hairy arms.)

(The bridesmaids are not all little people.)

8. (The bridesmaids are not all little people.)

(This boy's left hand is not actually massive.)

9. (This boy’s left hand is not actually massive.)

(This is not a young woman carrying a young man.)

10. (This is not a young woman carrying a young man.)

(This is not a tiny baby with fully grown legs.)

11. (This is not a tiny baby with fully grown legs.)

(The hockey player in blue did not punch the head off the hockey player in red.)

12. (The hockey player in blue did not punch the head off the hockey player in red.)

(The woman in lace actually has a head.)

13. (The woman in lace actually has a head.)

(This is not a boy with the face of a man.)

14. (This is not a boy with the face of a man.)

(That's not a boob.)

15. (That’s not a boob.)

Life Is An Echo… What Does Yours Say?

Echo3Carrie Fisher once said, “If my life wasn’t funny it would just be true, and that is unacceptable.” I admit that while I may find it humorous and often times easy to make fun of myself whether it be my weight, or the stupid mistakes I have made over the years, I never really considered how it might make other people feel.

While researching this topic I found an interesting article titled, “Using Humor to Help Bolster Your Life”. The article discusses if you find humor in something, can you survive it? The answer is yes, because humor is a perception and perception is almost everything in stress. How you perceive a situation plays a large part in determining whether or not you will be stressed and – this is a very big and – determines the solutions you can see. Seeing things from a more light-hearted point of view flexes your perceptual muscles to facilitate seeing additional options. In this respect, humorous thinking is very similar to creative thinking. Seeing the humor in a challenging situation usually allows you to solve it more creatively. For more from the article and some examples of how humor/laughter can be one of the most coping strategies, click here.

Sometimes we forget how important our words and thoughts really are. I am living proof that positive thinking does in fact work. Sure, I have weight to lose and more times than not I find humor in it, but that doesn’t mean I am not grateful and don’t appreciate all of the blessings that are in my life. Appreciating humor fosters optimism by softening negative thoughts with positive ones. Plus, humor’s positive emotions lead to greater confidence therefore, more creative thinking and problem solving.

So at the end of the day I am building perceptual muscles, gaining confidence and solving problems. Thank goodness this humor stuff is fat free and low in calories, I just may need more! 😉


If That’s A Muffin Top, Then I Have A Burger Bulge – Supersized

This morning I was reading through the headlines and I saw the following:

Kristin Chenoweth, 88 Pounds, Thinks She Has a “Muffin Top”

So naturally I clicked on the link and I read the story about how the beautiful and talented Kristin Chenoweth tweeted how she thought she had a muffin top in the picture shown here. (Photo Courtesy: Michael Simon/startraksphoto.com)


I’m not a doctor or a psychologist, so who cares what I have to say. Which leads me to the following reaction… ARE YOU FRICKIN’ KIDDING ME?? First of all, we are all critical of ourselves no matter what shape, size, color, gender etc. But if you’re so “worried” about your tiny little belly poking out over your size 1 bikini, maybe you should cover yourself up with a ski parka. (Oh wait, maybe it was a dreaded size 2. We all know going up a size can really wreck havoc on your psyche.)

When I read stories like this I wonder why people just can’t keep their mouth shut?! It’s not cute. It’s not even the slightest bit endearing. I don’t know about you but I certainly don’t think, “Awwww look at the beautiful, talented Kristin Chenoweth who looks amazing, is very talented, making money doing what she loves, but she does have a little pot on her.”

We are all flawed. Some of us have daily reminders every time we look in the mirror. But when I read something like this, something that is just an attention grabber because someone doesn’t feel as special as they should, I can’t help but roll my eyes and say “Okay, you wanted attention? You’ve got it! Congratulations, you made headlines. You’re being looked at from all areas of the world. Are you happy? Does it make your tragedy a little more tolerable? No? Well, okay… here is a picture of you and your “muffin top” fully exposed.”


There is a guy named Sam who lost both of his legs in Iraq this past month. His life is FOREVER changed and yet he and his fiancee focus on the positive. Their story should be the one making headlines, not this waste of time. (Yes, I know I’m wasting my time writing about it. But it feels sooo good!) 😉

So forgive me Ms. Chenoweth if I don’t shed tears over your sad observation of yourself as you frolicked around the beach in your little bikini. Instead I’m going to have a chocolate shake and a cheeseburger in your honor. You’re welcome.

In the future please feel free to refer to this guide if you are ever in doubt.


A Daddy’s Letter to His Little Girl (About Her Future Husband)

Re-posting from Dr. Kelly Flanagan (Thank you for a great post!)

April 17, 2013 — 7 Comments

Father Daughter Dance

Photo Credit: patrick_bird via Compfight cc

Dear Cutie-Pie,

Recently, your mother and I were searching for an answer on Google. Halfway through entering the question, Google returned a list of the most popular searches in the world. Perched at the top of the list was “How to keep him interested.”

It startled me. I scanned several of the countless articles about how to be sexy and sexual, when to bring him a beer versus a sandwich, and the ways to make him feel smart and superior.

And I got angry.

Little One, it is not, has never been, and never will be your job to “keep him interested.”

Little One, your only task is to know deeply in your soul—in that unshakeable place that isn’t rattled by rejection and loss and ego—that you are worthy of interest. (If you can remember that everyone else is worthy of interest also, the battle of your life will be mostly won. But that is a letter for another day.)

If you can trust your worth in this way, you will be attractive in the most important sense of the word: you will attract a boy who is both capable of interest and who wants to spend his one life investing all of his interest in you.

Little One, I want to tell you about the boy who doesn’t need to be kept interested, because he knows you are interesting:

I don’t care if he puts his elbows on the dinner table—as long as he puts his eyes on the way your nose scrunches when you smile. And then can’t stop looking.

I don’t care if he can’t play a bit of golf with me—as long as he can play with the children you give him and revel in all the glorious and frustrating ways they are just like you.

I don’t care if he doesn’t follow his wallet—as long as he follows his heart and it always leads him back to you.

I don’t care if he is strong—as long as he gives you the space to exercise the strength that is in your heart.

I couldn’t care less how he votes—as long as he wakes up every morning and daily elects you to a place of honor in your home and a place of reverence in his heart.

I don’t care about the color of his skin—as long as he paints the canvas of your lives with brushstrokes of patience, and sacrifice, and vulnerability, and tenderness.

I don’t care if he was raised in this religion or that religion or no religion—as long as he was raised to value the sacred and to know every moment of life, and every moment of life with you, is deeply sacred.

In the end, Little One, if you stumble across a man like that and he and I have nothing else in common, we will have the most important thing in common:


Because in the end, Little One, the only thing you should have to do to “keep him interested” is to be you.

Your eternally interested guy,



This post is, of course, dedicated to my daughter, my Cutie-Pie. But I also want to dedicate it beyond her.

I wrote it for my wife, who has courageously held on to her sense of worth and has always held me accountable to being that kind of “boy.”

I wrote it for every grown woman I have met inside and outside of my therapy office—the women who have never known this voice of a Daddy.

And I wrote it for the generation of boys-becoming-men who need to be reminded of what is really important—my little girl finding a loving, lifelong companion is dependent upon at least one of you figuring this out. I’m praying for you.


Comments: You can share your thoughts or reactions at the bottom of this post.   

Free eBook: My eBook, The Marriage Manifesto: Turning Your World Upside Down, is available free to new blog subscribers. If you are not yet a subscriber, you can click here to subscribe, and your confirmation e-mail will include a link to download the eBook. Or, the book is also now available for Kindle and Nook

Preview: Next Wednesday’s post is tentatively entitled, “How to Achieve Balance in a Healthy Marriage.”

Disclaimer: This post is not professional advice. It should be read as you would read a “self-help” book. For professional and customized advice, you should seek the services of a counselor, who can become more intimately familiar with your specific situation. Counselors can be located through your insurance network or through your state psychological association.


Texts From My Friends: PRICELESS

I have to admit I love talking trash with my friends. We will call each other and hurl out derogatory remarks as if they were going out of style. The other day I was going through my cell phone and I was impressed by how well my cell phone represented who I am. (I have calls to my Husband, Mom, Dad, a few friends, and of course the disgusting texts with my friends and much, much more.) Then I thought, “When I die, some poor bastard is going to look at my cell phone and get a very clear picture into the world of Heather.”

Then I thought, “Why should I wait until I’m dead to unleash the treasures that are stored deep within my iPhone?!” So if you don’t mind, I would like to take a moment and walk you through some of the highlighted random texts that I have received from so called “friends” of mine.

I love these people and I am grateful they are in my life… no matter how disgusting they are! 😉

Upon opening my phone you will see a picture of the Ferry in Steilacoom, WA.


Then we go straight to the text messages.  The circled “treasure” for today is from my friend Rick who is also the brother I always wished for. (And so grateful I found him.)


Phone5Now we skip to January, where Rick had called me earlier in the evening to explain that his New Years resolution was to eat better and in doing so the “roughage” was killing him. Of course I made a comment about his ass being a “Salad Shooter” and yelled at him to stop calling me from the bathroom. Then I get this text the next afternoon…

Phone7Yes, we are gross… but loveable! There will be more texts to come. Until then, happy texting (except while driving, riding a bike or flying a helicopter.)

The Travelin’ Twinkie

HeavenlyBodyIf you’ve ever searched for “World War 2 Nose Art” you will see that its a decorative painting on the nose of a military aircraft. Started for practical reasons of identifying friendly units, the practice evolved to evoke memories of home and peacetime life, and as a kind of psychological protection against the stresses of war and the probability of death.

I couldn’t help but think of that psychological protection today as I read a news article about Samoa Air, a small airline that is starting a “pay-by-weight” pricing for international flights. The larger you are, the bigger your price. I have received several e-mails from people asking my opinion and to be very honest, I think it’s great! I think every airline in the United States should do this as well.

Now before you toss your cheeseburger at the screen and curse my name, hear me out. I recently sat next to someone on my flight back from San Diego who was 6’4. He was so uncomfortable and wanted to get out of the seat as soon as the wheels touched the ground. I could understand his discomfort from all of the times I had to shove my over sized body into a tiny seat.  The difference between us — I could do something about the weight. He obviously can’t hit the gym and watch what he eats in order to become shorter.

So, be grateful that you have the option to work out and to eat right while losing weight and saving money. Some people don’t have that luxury. I think Samoa Air is doing us all a favor and paving the way for the future of travel and giving us yet another reason to get healthy and live well.

Let’s just hope they don’t paint their aircraft to show a large woman named “Memphis Bessy” sprawled out across the nose of the plane straddling a Twinkie while chowing down on a sammich as she races through the sky. 😉

Now the bags won’t be the only thing tagged “heavy” in the plane.