My Ass Could Double As A Hardwood Floor!

When you’ve been lied to, how do you handle it?

Do you listen to Henry Rollins’ song “Liar” over and over again while grabbing a flame thrower and going bat-shit crazy on the person? Or do you get quiet and just reflect on the issues at hand?

Well, I’ve allowed someone to remain in my life after they have lied to me on a few occasions. This last time, I’m walking away. It’s so hard because my gut is telling me to do one thing, my heart is fighting my gut and my brain seems to be in Hawaii sipping Mai Thai’s on the beach with a smokin’ hot guy. (Hey, it’s my brain, it can do whatever it wants!)

Have you ever reached the point in your life when you’ve been lied too so many times that it doesn’t surprise you anymore? I used to have walls up to try and protect myself from the hurt of being hurt. But I’ve been told that building walls can harden someone. So I slowly would let those walls down and allow that little bit of trust to seep in, just in time to have the rug yanked out from under me again. Let’s face it, I’ve been on the ground so much, my ass could double as a hardwood floor. Okay, now that I think about it, my ass being hard, flat and brown sounds kind of gross! 😉

I’ve gone through the major steps of being angry, sad, depressed, frustrated and now I’m at that point where I just don’t care. I Google searched “Laws of Attraction and Liars”. Sounds kind of lame I know, but I found a forum where someone said the following: “Instead of focusing on the lies, notice and be grateful for the times when they are honest and straightforward.”

I thought about that for awhile (as I put my flame thrower back in its case–kidding) 😉 and it all boils down to this… when someone is lying and I find out, I have to use that moment to better myself and try to not be angry, sad, depressed etc. I guess it’s one way of taking their lack of self respect for themselves and just confirming how much I respect myself.

Are You A Cartman Or A Kenny?

A few days ago I was out for a walk when the weather changed pretty quickly and the rain moved in before we could get to the house. The nerve damage in my left knee was hurting pretty bad and I started to use four letter words that I didn’t even know existed. The person I was with snapped a picture of me — to catch me in the moment?!

He started to laugh and said, “You’re cussing like Cartman but you look like Kenny!”  I started to laugh and as we walked back home I thought about that statement. Now, I don’t know what you think, but to me South Park is funny in its own messed up way. I wondered have I been a Kenny for all of these years? Quite, not really vocal and just allowing people to step all over me. Now, as I continue on this path that I’m on, have I finally channeled my inner Cartman where I tell people exactly what I think? Either way, it gave me something to ponder as I washed my mouth out with soap. (Are there calories in soap?) 😉

I Wouldn’t Even Sleep With Myself!

The person who decided to place a mirror directly across from the shower was either blind or a body builder. How can I possibly be successful in my laws of attraction and positive thinking when I start every day seeing myself naked. Let me just say this — there isn’t enough steam in the world to cover up this mass of ass.

While on this subject I want to discuss something kind of personal. (Really Heather? What a shock!) I would like to discuss intimacy and being overweight. I’ve heard from several people both male and female who say they are hurt when their significant other doesn’t find them attractive when they are overweight. My response to them is this… DUH! I wouldn’t expect someone to want to sleep with me when I wouldn’t even sleep with myself.

Now that I am on this weightloss journey I really don’t want to sleep with myself. Between the tents that I’m wearing because my clothes are getting bigger, the smell of leafy greens seeping out of my sweat glands to the nasty breath I have from eating a lot more protein, it’s amazing that I can even say I have a boyfriend right now. 😉 BUT… I do have a boyfriend and as I continue each day he smiles and loves me for who I am. There is one thing I do know for sure, he is with me through the good, the bad and obviously… the ugly.

So don’t be hurt when your significant other finds you repulsive. Use that feeling to motivate you to keep going. We are all truly beautiful on the inside and out and need to love ourselves before others can love us. Alright everyone… group hug! 😉

4 Health Rules You Can Break Today (Who doesn’t love breaking health rules?!)

4 Health Rules You Can Break Today

You’ll like the new versions better, we promise.
Leslie Goldman
O, The Oprah Magazine  |  From the February 2012 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine


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Photo: Mauricio Alejo

They’re the imperatives for well-being that have been drilled into us forever—”Drink eight glasses of water a day!” “Eat nine servings of fruits and veggies!” “Stay away from red meat!” But it turns out that taking care of yourself isn’t quite so black-and-white, says Harvard Medical School psychologist Alice Domar, PhD, coauthor of Live a Little! Breaking the Rules Won’t Break Your Health. “Research is revealing that whoever wrote the old guidelines didn’t have the whole picture, and that there are more paths to optimal health than we previously thought,” Domar says. Happily, the new rules are more user-friendly than the old ones. Here, four tips to live by.

Old Rule: Drink eight glasses of water a day.
New Rule: Eat your water.

The recommendation to chug all that H2O was likely based on guidelines published in 1945. However, says Howard Murad, MD, author of The Water Secret, much of your daily requirement is contained in foods: Fruits, vegetables, beans, and cooked whole grains like oatmeal and quinoa (which soak up moisture in the pot) all deliver servings of water. And, as Murad points out, they offer the added bonus of nutrients: “Watermelon and cucumber are more than 90 percent water, but they also contain antioxidants. With a glass of water, all you get is water.” You’ll know you’re hydrated when your urine is colorless or pale yellow and you’re rarely thirsty.

servings of fruit and vegetables
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Photo: Thinkstock


Old Rule: Eat nine servings of fruits and vegetables.
New Rule: Fill half your plate with produce.

A serving of broccoli is about five florets. A serving of raw spinach, one cup. A serving of mango, roughly the size of a fist. “It’s not surprising that people get confused over what, exactly, a serving is,” says Washington, D.C., dietitian Rebecca Scritchfield. Her advice: Stop counting and instead make half of every meal produce. “You don’t need a big mound on your plate. Six asparagus spears at dinner, a spinach salad at lunch, and a sliced banana and some berries at breakfast should do it.” And quality counts: Even two or three daily servings of deeply hued fruits and veggies (like blueberries, bok choy, or red peppers) may help reduce your risk of cancer and heart disease, Scritchfield says. “It’s like darts. The goal is to hit the bull’s-eye. But hitting nearby is good, too.”


red meat
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Photo: Thinkstock


Old Rule: Avoid red meat.
New Rule: Beef in moderation can be healthy.

Red meat was long considered a heart attack on a plate because it’s high in saturated fat. But a 2010 study from the Harvard School of Public Health found that the cardiovascular risk comes from processed varieties, such as sausage, hot dogs, and cold cuts—not from steak, hamburgers, and other nonprocessed cuts. (The real culprits may be salt and preservatives). Red meat is a good source of iron and immunity-boosting zinc—two nutrients some women don’t get enough of. Beef (especially grass-fed) also contains high concentrations of conjugated linoleic acid, a type of fat that may decrease cancer risk and help reduce body fat.

“But not all red meats are created equal,” says Leslie J. Bonci, director of sports nutrition at the University of Pittsburgh’s Center for Sports Medicine. She recommends choosing very lean cuts and avoiding anything labeled “prime,” as it will have more fat marbling. And try not to eat more than three 4- to 5-ounce servings (about the size of an iPhone) per week.

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Photo: Thinkstock


Old Rule: Keep your BMI between 18.5 and 24.9.
New Rule: Eat healthy, exercise, and let your weight settle naturally.

Physicians use BMI (body mass index)—a ratio of your weight to your height—as a tool to diagnose obesity. But critics say BMI ignores muscle mass, and a 2011 Obesity study notes that it also ignores a person’s hip circumference. “People come in different sizes and shapes,” says Joanne Ikeda, nutritionist emeritus at the University of California, Berkeley. “The idea that everyone should fall under 25 is ludicrous.” A person can have a high BMI and still be healthy, Ikeda argues. Research supports the theory: A Journal of the American Medical Association study found that fit women—even if they were overweight according to their BMI—were less likely to suffer a heart attack than those who were out of shape. Ikeda advises her patients to stop obsessing over their BMI, eat a nutritious diet, and log 150 minutes of exercise per week. “A healthy lifestyle results in a healthy weight.”